Finding out your expecting is a really exciting and life altering moment. Even though I’ve not had trouble getting pregnant, I still feel nervous to take the test when I suspect we have a new blue or pink bundle joining our family. It’s a good nervous, but the unknowns that begin at that moment are about to be real.
I think back 8 years ago when we found out just before Christmas that we were having our first. I felt normal, but the test had the faintest of faint lines indicating I was pregnant. Could it be for real? It was and we decided to keep it a secret for the next 12 weeks. That meant we travelled cross country and saw family over Christmas and we didn’t share our news in person when we had the chance. I wanted to, but everybody I knew waited to tell. I thought I had to as well.
Baby #2 we found out about 6 years ago this month. Ah, we were doing this again and we were really excited. However, I was really sick with Annabelle. I felt like I hid under a rock for 2 months before we told anybody why I was so anti-social. I think we only last 10-11 weeks before we told.
Baby #3 was my worst pregnancy as far as sickness goes. I got to soak in the happy news that my pregnancy test was positive and I was sick by the next week. Morning sickness didn’t usually set in so quickly. I actually questioned if I might be further along then my calculations.
Why would I keep such happy news from the people that love and care for me?
I have found myself re-evaluating our past decision to keep pregnancies a secret for 12 weeks. I think we will share any future happy news much sooner so we can explain why I’m not feeling well and share the joy of another life joining our family. While I completely understand how hard it would be to tell an excited sibling that our baby went to heaven if something should happen, would I want to keep that from family and friends too? We would miss out on their love and support as we grieved. I’ve grieved the loss of my own sibling (as an adult) and outside of God’s comfort, I had a really amazing support group in my family and friends.
When to share you are pregnant:
This is completely subjective, but I feel like I would like to learn from the past and share earlier when we have baby #4. I read THIS article last year and it really resonated with me. Life is precious and I want my family and friends praying for us and our baby from the very beginning. I know many miscarriages occur in the first trimester, but I would like to celebrate our baby’s life (no matter how long or short), rather then keep it a secret.
It seems that each pregnancy I’ve had has included morning sickness earlier, more severe, and it’s lasted longer. When we told with Charlie, I shared how sick I had been and my grandparents said, “We wish we knew so we could have been praying for you to feel better.” It was a really sweet comment that also got me to thinking that we shouldn’t be so secretive.
The first question people ask:
How far along are you? Clearblue has such cool pregnancy tests! Look at all the fancy stuff tests include now.
· The Clearblue Advanced Pregnancy Test with Weeks Estimator is an over-the-counter urine hCG test which is intended for the detection of pregnancy. The test detects hCG in some cases from 4 days before the expected period (which is 5 days before the day of the missed period).
· This test is only intended for individual use at home. It is not intended for use in a healthcare setting.
· This test contains a ‘Weeks Estimator.’ The ‘Weeks Estimator’ is meant solely as an estimate for the consumer and is not intended as a substitute for a doctor’s clinical diagnosis. The ’Weeks Estimator’ is not intended for multiple pregnancies. The estimate provided by the device may be inaccurate in these cases.
· This test cannot be used to determine the duration of pregnancy or to monitor the progression of pregnancy. Your doctor determines how many weeks pregnant you are based on the first day of your last menstrual period and ultrasound results. This test provides a different estimate that cannot be substituted for a doctor’s determination of gestational age. Only your doctor can provide a reliable estimate of gestational age and only your doctor can monitor pregnancy progression. You should seek qualified prenatal care if you suspect you are pregnant.
Technology is amazing to me. While baby #4 isn’t due for about 18 more months. (just teasing, I really don’t know when we will be ready for our next) I can’t wait to try out Clearblue and not only get happy news.
The Clearblue YouTube channel has some great videos to give you more information about this product.
I’ll be ready to tell people sooner this time, but not too soon! You know those people that basically tell where, when, and how their child was conceived and it’s going to happen next week. LOL! Don’t be that person! Give yourself a chance to soak in the news, schedule a doctor’s appointment, and then have fun telling. Here was my favorite announcement from October 2012. It’s funny because I had the kids pose for this photo and they didn’t know why they were holding pumpkins. We told them a few days later.
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About a month with close family, longer with friends
After I hear the heart beat!
I’d like to wait a couple months, or until people start notice that I’m showing. 😉
after a couple months
I plan on waiting 2-3 months.
We told everyone as soon as we found out!
We tell close friends and family right away, we wait till the 2nd trimester to announce on social media. Just in case there was any complications I would want my family close by, but not all of my Facebook friends!
I found out when I was a little over 12 weeks even tho I “knew” alot earlier.. I took my first tests when I was over a month over and they both came up negative then I took another a month later and it came up positive.
Thanks for the chance!
With our first two pregnacies I announced at 6-7 weeks but learned my lesson when baby number two was lost around ten weeks. So for our third we waited until we were 13 weeks and told everyone at Christmas.
i would like to tell people when im pregnant is after a month of knowing about it!
I usually tell within the first 8 weeks – I’m no good at keeping a secret! 🙂
12 weeks the first time, sooner after that
I waited as long as I could because of my past.
After the first ultrasound! It was at 7 or 8 weeks with our daughter.
When I confirm it at the doctor.
We always tell at 3 weeks when we find out. I’ve even blabbed at 8 dpo when I tested positive. I suffered a blighted ovum before and it felt good to have that emotional support surrounding us.
We would love to win this for our POAS parties!!
We can never keep it a secret. Both times we were so excited that we shared the news before the test could even dry haha. We want a big family, so baby news is always so exciting, especially when we’ve been trying for awhile.
We found out this last Halloween that we were expecting #3! We decided on not telling anyone for a while, I don’t start showing until the last trimester. We thought it would be fun to, on April first, say that we were having a baby in a couple of months! We also have a boy and a girl, so we weren’t going to find out gender. Well, the end of November came and I told my husband I felt weird. Wasn’t getting the normal fatigue, sleepless nights, nauseous all the time. Things I lack when I had two previous miscarriages, but with those, I hadn’t gotten as far along. The beginning of December came and I lost the baby. I was a mess. I just wanted my mom. I wanted comfort, something I never came to feel over this loss. When I called my mom, she said she had no idea we were expecting! It was the same reaction from many others, people that needed to watch the kids… They all tried to comfort me, nothing worked. I had a moment of regret, soon after our loss. This baby wasn’t celebrated enough. Yes, cute surprises are cute, but I’m done waiting to announce. I want the spirit that is with us for any amount of time, to know that it is loved more than measure by countless people.
I’m so sorry you lost your precious baby. You will always remember you angel baby. I hope you have healed a little bit since this loss. I haven’t had a miscarriage, but I know grief. It takes time. I would have wanted to plan a similar cute surprise at one point in life, but I too realize that life can be to short. It’s fun to live in the moment too. {{HUGS}}
I told after the NT scan with my first and just before with my second which ended in mc due to TS complications. Next time I’m waiting for any testing.
We told our moms a few days after finding out and close family at about 8wks but the rest of the world was after 1sy trimester. I do think it would be easier for people to understand and help if needed if told earlier. Idk what we will do next time!
I tried to wait a little bit but always ended up blurting out because i would be so excited.
I think 3 months is ideal.
I’m a guy never experienced this
I get so excited I usually tell immediately…currently pregnant with baby #6, I waited a lot longer than usual this time knowing that I would not have many positive remarks…but the people that really matter, my husband and close friends and family still knew right away. I also have never had a miscarriage so I can assume that I might wait longer if I was unsure of the outcome of the pregnancy. good luck to all!
Congrats on #6. You are a busy momma! No judgments here. I came from a big family and loved it.
I ike to wait till I hear the heartbeat.
We’re still working on getting pregnant – I think I’d wait to tell people until after the first trimester just to ensure that there were no problems or complications. I suspect that we would tell our immediate family (who live very far away) sooner.
Close family within a few weeks.. most others after a few months.
We have always tended to wait 12 weeks to tell family and then longer to tell social media wise