With Valentine’s Day coming up, and World Happiness Day on March 20th, many struggle with a simple, yet for some, an unachievable way of life – how to be happy.
I think everyone strives to be happy everyday regardless of how their day is going. I know for a fact that when things are not going my way at any time, I still try to put on a happy face. It’s just how we are. I try my hardest not to bring others down if I’m not feeling happy. It’s your choice whether you are happy or not….choose to be happy. So many things can happen when you are feeling happy. It makes others happy!
Dr. Dain Heer, a world-renowned personal development educator and author of Being You, Changing the World, is something of an unusual authority on being happy—mainly because he was previously very unhappy, suicidal to be accurate, and (after trying every other possible solution) found a way to not only rediscover joy but to go on to help thousands of others do it too.
According to Heer, the solutions are simpler than we think, and he guarantees if you follow the same steps as he did, that the “heavy” feeling can soon be a thing of the past.
- Move: It is simple and ridiculously effective. Scientists don’t talk about endorphins for no reason. Getting out and getting active, even if it’s the last thing you want to do, will definitely make you feel better, especially if you incorporate this into your regular lifestyle. Take baby steps if you are out of shape; start with a five minute walk around the block and increase incrementally from there.
- Banish Judgment: Judgment is a killer of so many things – happiness, productivity, relationships, and growth—and getting rid of it will give you the lightness you seek. Stop judging others but more importantly, stop judging yourself. Don’t see things in your life as good, bad, right, wrong or ‘how they should or shouldn’t be.’ This is even more important in the age of social media. Don’t rate your life on the ideals you see on the Internet or what your Facebook friends’ lives look like. Let life just be. Stop analyzing everything and refrain from categorizing it into positive and negative. Learn to banish judgment and it will free you.
- Ask Questions and Don’t Look for Answers: Looking for answers limits our possibilities. Questions empower us, while looking for one right answer will lock you into one way of thinking. For example, instead of asking yourself, ‘why am I always broke?’ or ‘why can’t I meet the right person?’ and answering yourself with something unhelpful like “because I’m unattractive or I am not smart enough.” Why not try asking yourself, “What would it take to change this?” The key is not to look for an answer—instead just put it out there and see what happens! By asking open-ended questions you stop yourself going down the same well-worn path and can suddenly see other options and possibilities. Perhaps you will even find a possibility that will change your future!
- Choose to Be Happy: You’ve heard that saying happiness is a state of mind—well, it is, because it is a choice. You can choose to be happy or you can choose to be glum – but not both. If you find yourself in conflict with people around you, or in conflict with yourself, forget about “winning” the argument. Instead, choose happiness. And, if your situation or state of living doesn’t allow this, then be proactive. Make a list of all of the things that need to change in order for you to achieve happiness.
- Give Love: “What if instead of striving for love, you were willing to have gratitude and caring for others without judgment or offense?” Dr. Heer asks. According to Heer, the socially acceptable idea of love—including complete relationship unity—is a destructive fantasy. “Love means something different to every one of us,” he explains. “It is impossible to determine; impossible to find. Strive instead to be grateful, caring and completely accepting of yourself and those around you.”
Did you choose to be happy today? These are great little tips on how you can help yourself and others be happy. Choose happiness!